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The unmarried men in Pentwater were unmarried for the best of reasons. In later years a comedian would say it best, "You can't fix stupid!" Not one of...them would do. The hunt was on.We sophomores had done our possible to drive our math teacher, Mr. Wojciechowski, starkers. He had this pulsing blood vessel in his forehead that grew bigger the madder he got."Algebra is easy!" Woejoe would scream, "It's just substituting letters for numbers." "The girls get it ... look at them."And all the girls. Denise slept on the left side of the bed my wife in the middle and me on the right side. The lights went out and my mind began to whirl. I had to get next to Denise, but how? I turned over and "accidentally" fell off the bed. I acted more drunk than I was and talked about being dizzy and the room spinning. When I climbed back on the bed my wife said "you sleep in the middle, I'm not having you fall out and break something." I reluctantly got in the middle and laid on my back. I waited. I didn’t HAVE a broom closet... Slowly and quietly, I opened the door a bit more and peered in.I pulled my head back from the opening. Nope. Nope, that ain’t right, I thought.I continued into my bedroom and looked to where its wall constrained that side of the closet. I then retreated back into the living room and looked at how its wall would be the boundary for the side of the closet opposite of that. Finally, I poked my head out the window to confirm that the outside wall of the building was. THINGS someplace where everybodyknows me. I'd have died of shame!"Yes, Lupe had started her period and she wasn't handling it very well."Look, Micki, you know that until a few months ago I was ahermaphrodite, or, I guess the accepted term now is "intersexed." I'vestudied up on that ... condition and there's hardly any record of one ofus menstruating. So I really hadn't given much thought to thepossibility. Sure, because of Cat's milk, I can change genders at willnow, but that was still no.
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