Arriving at the beach my worst fears were confirmed, just about every guy there was bigger than me, and they were just the white guys.At one end of th... beach there was a large group of local black men, all of whom were very muscular and well hung.?Lets go and lay by there? Mel said pointing directly where the black studs were fooling around playing volleyball with a group of white women. Was this going to be embarrassing I though, the black men all had huge cocks swaying menacingly between. I can almost feel the bile rising to my throat at thisprospect..."Take it easy," Mum whispers as she helps me out of the car and waitsfor me to compose myself before leading us into the crematorium.I can feel the eyes of some of the mourners on us as we take our seatsa few rows back from the front, and while I know that logically, they'dbe looking at anyone entering the room, a part of me still can't helpbut wonder if they've 'clocked' me. Admittedly, I do get this feelingeverywhere I go, and. But it was my fault. The first time he kissed me I realized I’d made a mistake. I was so overwhelmed with self-loathing that I froze. He kept going and I started to fight him off. I said, ‘No. I can’t do this.’ He just kept pulling my clothes off. I pushed and scratched, but I couldn’t get away from the constant hammering in my head that this was what I deserved. I deserved to be humiliated and raped. I deserved everything he did. I hated myself. You think I deserved it, too.”I managed to bring. .. ?" Just like that, Dad," I said, interrupting him. "Oh, you'll need to make a business plan including milestones, or goals that you must meet along the way, but if you do, it'll happen. Do you want to know why I believe this?" Why?" Because you are overqualified for what you do," I said."What about the jobs I have?" he said."Sell your business to a competitor," I said."Humph, easy for you to say," he grumped."He's right, you know," Maureen said."What about putting food on the table?" Dad.
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