In reality, a long pause is four or five seconds ... honest. Five seconds seems to take forever.This pause creeped. It lasted a good minute while ever...body considered the implications of what Grandmother Austin said. There are a lot ... the consequences of that being even a remote possibility. Yeah ... what the new secretary said.The speculation began.Oh, man ... it's not just the Derby...Grace thought, 'He knows the answers to the tests.' She started scheming.Lucy thought, 'He knows ... Oh God. All these things are best dealt with if the Minister is relaxed and in good humour. Ministerial concubines provide an important public benefit. I have no difficulty in justifying to myself the cost to the public purse. And since we expect to do much business with your country, I felt it would be only helpful to have one of your compatriots in my service." She seems a little less than willing, Minister," I said, noting how Cora was now almost growling through her gag."It will be a while," the. I was ridiculous.The note said she would return in the morning. Until then, I would have to do the best I could. So much for easy phases and small steps. I was in for 24 hours of being Jean Adams whether I liked it or not.I put the note Jean had written away in the purse and carefully arranged the strap over my arm. Then I picked up the dresses from the hook, checked in the mirror to make sure I was wearing the right face, took a deep breath, and stepped out of the booth.Just going to the end. Only the moment is real. The now. The incident and the event are real,but only as long as they happen, for memories, also, are unreal.Very well. Let me explain. Perhaps an example will help. My breasts arereal when their weight is in my hands--or yours. They have density, then;they are tangible; they are measurable. Unmistakably, they haveexistence. But, after the moment, when they are no longer held, they arejust ideas, nothing more than memories.Eva, my former love, says I am too.
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